The Mouth of the South is turning the clock back 20 plus years today. Before Facebook. Before MySpace. To a simpler time, where you played Snake on your cell phone and located where your friends were by reading their cryptic AIM Away Messages. Back to when HotOrNot.com jumpstarted the world into "social media". But this time, applying the concept to each of the 15 RDBL Franchises over the past 7 days, and scoring them on a scale of 10 (The Hottest, think Jason Watson on the cover of Sports Illustrated) down to 1 (Not Remotely Hot, think Jason Watson today).
Alamo Short Stacks - 196 hitting, 177 pitching
Impressive at the plate and from the hill the past week, the Short Stacks have climbed up toward the top of the standings recently. A sub-1.00 WHIP has really driven much of the scoring, led two dominant Brandon Woodruff outings and one more from Yu Darvish. The bats have been led by an interesting trio, the two young bats of Trent Grisham and Vlad Guerrero Jr, countered by the ageless Jed Lowrie, who has slashed 391/462/696 the last week.
Rating - 9
Asti Grape Stompers - 139 hitting, 168 pitching
The Grapes actually have the most dominant pitching performance by standard baseball measure the last week with a 0.86 ERA, but with just 41.2 IP they can't rack up as much scoring as a few other teams. Meanwhile, Shohei Ohtani is starting to look more and more like the next $50+ player in the RDBL with his ridiculous week from the plate.
Rating - 7.5
Burlingame Blue Ducks - 152 hitting, 128 pitching
The defending champs have been incredibly balanced the last week. No one player really stands out, and no one statistic really stands out except that they posted 53.2 IP in the last 7 days. Overall, a good average approach that has helped float them to the top third of the standings.
Rating - 6.5
Cloverdale Clovers - 186 hitting, 141 pitching
Although it doesn't score additional points (much to the disagreement of The Mouth of the South), the Clovers 62 K in 51 IP is worth noting how impressive some of their pitching has been. But a few bad starts and a Greg Holland meltdown stopped them from being one of the hottest teams in the RDBL. Meanwhile, the bats have been sensational. Rafael Devers and Juan Soto lead the way of a roster slugging 496 the past week with 18 HR, the most in the RDBL.
Rating - 8
Honolulu Hammerheads - 165 hitting, 139 pitching
Corbin Burnes. Jacob DeGrom. Corbin Burnes. Jacob DeGrom. Corbin Burnes. Jacob DeGrom. Corbin Burnes. Jacob DeGrom. Corbin Burnes. Jacob DeGrom. Corbin Burnes. Jacob DeGrom. Yes, there are other members of the Heads, but do they matter? Byron Buxton has meanwhile raked while fighting through an illness and some hamstring issues, leading the strong hitting performance.
Rating - 7.5
Idaho Taters - 160 hitting, 104 pitching
Only two teams posted higher ERAs the last week, as the Taters fought through some rough starts from their rotation. Meanwhile, a lack of at bats from top performers stunted what should have been a higher scoring hitting week. They may not rate high today, but they are the team The Mouth wants to keep an eye on the next 7.
Rating - 6
Lake Merced Goutfish - 196 hitting, 195 pitching
The scary part of this paragraph is that all of this scoring happened with Fernando Tatis Jr. sitting on the IL. Ronald Acuna slashed a Barry Bonds-esque 560/613/1040 for 52.5 points the last 7 days to carry a large portion of the offensive load for the Goutfish. While Lance Lynn threw a complete game shutout to lead a pitching staff that posted a 1.99/0.88 slash over 54+ innings of work. No surprise who the current leaders are on the RDBL Standings page.
Rating - 10
Las Vegas Aristocrats - 201 hitting, 18 pitching
The former leaders of the RDBL, and for good reason. Their offense led all teams, and with no real strong leader or weak candidate, just perfectly balanced across the board with a 371 OBP to post maximum points. But when you consider the pitching staff posted only 18 points while getting 53 from Joe Musgrove's no-hitter...you shutter to think what went wrong. Zack Grienke, -19. Ryan Yarborough, -23. Zach Davies, -31. Max Friend, -51 and a stint on the IL. Not very elitist of the Aristocrats.
Rating - 2
Lunatic Fringe - 144 hitting, 167 pitching
The Fringe have fallen short of The Mouth's projections as the elite of the RDBL this year. And it's not due to poor management. 67+ innings last week and a slew of starts this week. Just poor execution thus far from the bats, who have posted just 228.5 points so far. Expectations are high, and this offense isn't going to get it done.
Rating - 7.5
Maltese Falcons - 116 hitting, 49 pitching
Hard to score much from the mound with just 25.2 IP. Hard to score much from the plate hitting just 225. The Falcons struggles saw them fall to the bottom of the standings.
Rating - 1
Meinert Hops - 120 hitting, 136 pitching
Where's the Cedric Mullins trash talk now?
Rating - Dead To The Mouth
Mission Viejo Maulers - 82 hitting, 98 pitching
A moral victory not being dead last...but only delaying the inevitable.
Rating - 1.5
Mt. Diablo Devils - 145 hitting, 60 pitching
Rumors swirling the Devils are close to hitting the sell button already! And for good reason! Yaz has been a mess, and their team 5+ ERA last week was only beaten by the Crats for worst in the league.
Rating - 2
Spokane Fightin' Fish - 118 hitting, 209 pitching
Trevor Bauer has lived up to his large price tag thus far for both the Dodgers and the Fish. His 61 last week pushed the Fish to the top of the pitching stats the last 7. But the bats lagged, Jose Ramirez, and Pete Alonso underperformed solidly. But the Fish spent under $100 on their lineup before trading for Trevor Story on Auction Night. Could a trade be in the works for a bat or two?
Rating - 8
St. Joseph Jokers - 143 hitting, 118 pitching
We have touched on the Jokers lack of pitching before when Rick Steen decided to spend the least amount in the RDBL on pitching. But the Joker bats were disappointing, considering their robust budget. Jose Abreu, Trea Turner, and Tommy Pham were just 10/63
Rating - 6
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